Jul. 8th, 2009

Silly mood

Jul. 8th, 2009 09:54 am
bobquasit: (Default)
A question was asked on Askville today:

"why does my dell laptop not recognize my 4gb integral flash drive"

My answer:
Because they haven't been properly introduced.

You need to set up a formal dinner or cocktail party - RSVP, of course - and invite both of them to come. During the evening, escort the flash drive over to the laptop and say "Mr. Laptop, may I introduce Miss Flash Drive? Miss Flash Drive, may I introduce Mr. Laptop? I think you two have a lot in common."

Then discretely slip away to give them a chance to get better acquainted.

Come to think of it, I may have confused the genders. Yes, my mistake; considering who plugs in to whom, it would be Mr. Flash Drive and Miss Laptop. Sorry for the error!

(Yes, I'm very bored this morning. :D )
bobquasit: (Default)
Two people over on Goodreads now suspect that my post about Lewis' novelization of Prince Caspian was serious. I had to clear that up:

Actually, the whole post is pure sarcasm. I was half-way through reading Prince Caspian to my son while we were on vacation recently, when he saw that the movie was available for rent at a local supermarket. I was stunned at how many liberties the movie took with the book - C.S. Lewis must be reaching truly astonishing RPMs in his grave.

Even my son was outraged at how untrue to the book the movie was, and he's only seven! He did like my sarcastic rendition of Caspian's dialog in an extremely cheesy Spanish accent ("Susan, I am so hot-blooded that when I see you shooting that bow, my lips tremble with passion.")

He also cracked up when Aslan breathed on someone - I forget who - and I said "Hey, Lion. Have a breath mint." So that gives you some idea of his sense of humor.

I'm very familiar with Lewis and Tolkien, which is why I get so annoyed at how badly they've been represented in the films of their work. I must admit that it also annoys me that so many people don't seem to notice the abusive, unnecessary, and essentially disrespectful nature of many of the changes that Hollywood has made to the original plotlines and dialog.

I'm reminded of an old joke:

There was an idiot whose lifelong dream had been to star in a play. One day, he unexpectedly inherited a large sum of money. He immediately arranged to put on a huge production of Hamlet with himself in the starring role.

No expense was spared; the production was held in the largest and fanciest playhouse in town. The best supporting actors were hired, as was the best director. All the critics and leading citizens were invited to opening night.

When Hamlet stepped on the stage, however, it was soon obvious that not only not only did he NOT have any talent, he actually embodied the opposite of talent; he was actively painful to watch. Within a few minutes, the audience was booing and throwing things at the stage. Stopping the production, the anguished Hamlet shouted out "Hey, don't blame me - I didn't write this crap!"
bobquasit: (Default)
Someone over on Askville asked "What can be done to stop cyber-attacks?". He's concerned about the recent news of internet attacks. My very reasurring response:

Cyber-attacks are easily stopped with a handful of gold dust thrown into the Cybermen's respiratory intake grids. It's best to have the help of a Doctor in that process, though.


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