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Mommy and Me
*RINNNG*
"Hello?"
"Honey, have you heard of 'Little Man'?"
"What is it?"
"A movie."
"I don't think so...wait a minute! Yeah, I think it's a movie about a gangsta midget who tricks a man into thinking that he's a baby and has all sort of sexual and criminal hi-jinx."
"No way. It's a Mommy and Me movie at the theater this morning!"
"Let me look it up...yup, 'A man anxious to be a father mistakes an extremely short-statured, baby-faced criminal on the run as his newly adopted son.' 'PG-13 for Crude and Sexual Humor Throughout, Language and Brief Drug References.'"
"Oh my god. What about 'Click'?"
"Remember 'Bruce Almighty'?"
"Yes?"
"It's basically that, with Adam Sandler instead of Jim Carrey, and instead of Morgan Freeman making him God, Christopher Walken gives him an all-powerful remote control. Let me see...'PG-13 for language, crude and sex related humor and some drug references.'."
"!"
"Sorry."
"...what about 'Superman'?"
"I'll bet that's the least offensive of them, but let me look it up. Hmm, 'PG-13 for some intense action violence'."
"Oh no."
"I hate to say it, but even that would probably be a bad idea. We don't want Sebastian doing more kicking or punching."
"I know. But all that leaves is 'Cars', and he saw that last week. Why would they show all those movies for Mommy and Me day?"
"Because they know that toddlers love crude and sexual humor, language and brief drug references!"
"Hello?"
"Honey, have you heard of 'Little Man'?"
"What is it?"
"A movie."
"I don't think so...wait a minute! Yeah, I think it's a movie about a gangsta midget who tricks a man into thinking that he's a baby and has all sort of sexual and criminal hi-jinx."
"No way. It's a Mommy and Me movie at the theater this morning!"
"Let me look it up...yup, 'A man anxious to be a father mistakes an extremely short-statured, baby-faced criminal on the run as his newly adopted son.' 'PG-13 for Crude and Sexual Humor Throughout, Language and Brief Drug References.'"
"Oh my god. What about 'Click'?"
"Remember 'Bruce Almighty'?"
"Yes?"
"It's basically that, with Adam Sandler instead of Jim Carrey, and instead of Morgan Freeman making him God, Christopher Walken gives him an all-powerful remote control. Let me see...'PG-13 for language, crude and sex related humor and some drug references.'."
"!"
"Sorry."
"...what about 'Superman'?"
"I'll bet that's the least offensive of them, but let me look it up. Hmm, 'PG-13 for some intense action violence'."
"Oh no."
"I hate to say it, but even that would probably be a bad idea. We don't want Sebastian doing more kicking or punching."
"I know. But all that leaves is 'Cars', and he saw that last week. Why would they show all those movies for Mommy and Me day?"
"Because they know that toddlers love crude and sexual humor, language and brief drug references!"