Irritable

[bobquasit]

Maybe it's because Sebastian woke up feverish and vomiting two night ago.

Maybe it's because life has been particularly stressful lately, and it just doesn't seem to let up.

Maybe it's because I'm tired of making comments on people's journals and rarely getting a response.

Maybe it's because I'm tired of wondering if that lack of response is my fault somehow.

Who the fuck cares? I'm just sick of everything today.

For two cents I'd say "fuck it" and pull the plug on this stupid goddamned journal.

I don't need this bullshit.


...


It looks like I may have to spend the night in Boston...my baby boy cried for fifteen minutes when Teri told him that.

Comments

[tprjones.livejournal.com]

If it helps at all, there's at least one person that still reads and cares ... I just never have anything useful to say so I lurk instead.

But do what you need to do for you and your family, by all means. That's what's most important in this life.

[badger2305.livejournal.com]

I hear you on the effects of stress. And I know saying "try to relax" is sub-optimal. Sleep might help.

[scarletdemon.livejournal.com]

Oh damn, things sound like they're getting too much. Have a (hug), it's a bit crap but I'm not there in real life.

[klyfix.livejournal.com]

Eh, if I was going cut my LJ 'cause of a lack of comments I'd have killed it a while back. I don't get much in the way of comments, presumably because of a lack of exposure of course but also because I post what I find of interest and not often what anybody else finds of interest. Part of why I went with the LJ; I recognized that my "Hey, look at the Neat Thing!" emails were drival, mostly.

Your stuff is good, but not always something that I have a comment worth making.

This is someting of a Stressful Time these days. There just seems to be more, well, lack of Hope. Don't know if that's 'cause of age or realistic.

[bobquasit.livejournal.com]

Thanks; I appreciate that. I guess I'm mostly bugged because I'm short of sleep, and because there's a health problem in my family that I probably shouldn't talk about. Nothing fatal, just hellishly stressful...and unending. Or at least that's how it feels right now.

[bobquasit.livejournal.com]

Ah, sleep...you know, that's a good point. The problem is that I don't GET to sleep.

It reminds me of a short story by Lord Dunsany. And thanks to the miracle of the internet, here it is (http://www.litrix.com/dtales/dtale016.htm)!

[bobquasit.livejournal.com]

Fortunately I was able to get home after all; it was after 11 PM before I got to sleep, but I was able to check in on the boy.

He was running a temperature again, 101.6 F (38.67 C to you, I suppose).

*sigh*

Thanks for the hug; even a virtual one is better than nothing. :D

101.6 F

[scarletdemon.livejournal.com]

I understand this. I don't buy into all that E.U. French measurements bullshit. I talk in Miles, feet, inches, pounds, ounces..."Back Off Brussels!".

[bobquasit.livejournal.com]

Well, it's not so much the terrible dearth of comments. If that was the problem, I'd run up against the "man with no feet" issue, viz (of course) your own journal. And I don't want feel like a whiner, although I probably AM one; it's just that it bugs me that in some cases I comment pretty freely in some journals, and get little to no response or reciprocity.

Well, actually it isn't even so much that. The biggest problem is that I'm not just tired, but worn out. Mentally. I mean, I can cope with all the crap, no question - I can cope indefinitely, in all likelihood. But I'm tired of it. I'm tired of the isolation. I'm tired of worrying about money. I'm tired of worrying about the future, about democracy, about all too often not having anybody to bloody TALK to about anything.

It was really great having you and everyone over on Saturday, incidentally, but in a way that only exacerbated the problem. I know that I probably won't be able to have another great day like that for a very long time.

Once a year for Arisia. Once or twice a year for you guys. Lois visits a bit more often, but still less than once every three months. I see my family maybe once a month if I'm lucky.

This sounds lame, but I grew up without any friends at all. I used up my lifetime quota of loneliness. When I got to college, all of a sudden I had a lot of friends and a great social life, albeit a perfectly platonic one. And after college, life in Malden was GREAT - I got to see all my friends so often!

And now I've had to crawl back into that box of isolation, and it totally fucking sucks. Sebastian is my sole consolation, and he's the best in the world...but the day is coming ever closer when he will leave me.

And what will I do then?

[charibdis.livejournal.com]

Well, if you feel like coming over on the weekends, the offer's still open.

Isolation does suck. I'm sorry you have to deal with it. Maybe if there was a better way for us to get together over the internet?

[dancing-kiralee.livejournal.com]

1) Sometimes I enjoy your posts, but have nothing to add. Your recent nintendo post is a good example. I liked the post, but don't play nintendo games... so, not really much I could say about it.

2) Isolation sucks, but I'm not sure if there is anything I can do about it. We would if we could, for what it's worth.

Kiralee

[klyfix.livejournal.com]

Well, if you were in, say, Brookline, I'd probably be making a nusiance of myself. :)

I find the future troubling, not because I see Darkness but because I don't really see anything. The dreams of a future with humanity going out into the solar system and all manner of Wonders, of prosperity and going on to a new level of civilization, seem now to mostly be wishful thinking. And not because we can do those Great Things, but because humanity lacks the spirit to do Great Things. We seem to have a ruling class at the moment that in some ways seems to want to revert to the 19th Century, to a time when the rich and corporations could do whatsoever they cared to do...no, that's not right. Because back then people did Great Things; they took risks and made a new world (admittedly often hurting a lot of others in the process). There were Frontiers; one could pack up everything and go to lands freshly stolen (or in the process of being stolen) from the natives and get away from the opression at home. We don't have that option anymore, really. We're trapped, and there's not a lot we can do about it.

Okay, uhh, that's a tangental rant.

[unquietsoul5.livejournal.com]

Sorry that the universe is being it's usual apathetic self these days... I would have commented earlier, but as you know we were knocked offline yesterday by the electrician and only got back online this afternoon.

I haven't been posting as much myself, nor seeing many comments either. I think this year has seen a drop off of many people being involved in LJ (but I could be wrong) who were more heavily involved last year.

I think I'm still near the top for posters in your journal... and doing ok in the lists of a bunch of others, but I have slacked off in recent weeks (Kiralee's job status change has increased my workload at home in some ways and decreased my free time and online time too).

I often wonder, considering how often Sebastian seems to come down sick, as to whether he's suffering from stress as well like you do that might be dropping his immunity levels. Being Stressed out makes you a target for problems....