bobquasit | A resolution?

I had a wild idea yesterday.

What if we stopped going out to eat?

A meal in a restaurant usually costs about $30 for the three of us, on average. I did some math, and eating at home costs around $9 for the three of us (or less). So each meal out effectively takes $21 out of our budget.

Since we go to a restaurant at least 6-8 times per week (counting breakfast, lunch, and/or dinner on the weekends), that means we're blowing $126 to $168 dollars a week...or over $504 to $672 a month...or $6,552.00 to $8,736.00 per YEAR!

HOLY SHIT!

I'd mis-crunched the numbers, before!

Currently the only reason we're able to eat at all is that we're using up the money I'd set aside for a new computer (yes, once again we're broke). It hurts...it hurts a LOT to see it all go again. The computer wasn't my biggest dream, but I've had to give it up over and over and over.

And I have to worry: if we can't make it on our income now, how will we manage when (if) there are four of us? How can we ever hope to move out of this shithole of a city into a decent school district?

So I suggested to Teri that we try not going out to eat for one month, just to see what would happen. I don't want to pressure her, and neither one of us would want to give up dining out permanently...but the pleasure of dining out is more than overmatched by the pain, fear, and desperation we face for weeks every month when we're out of money.

This has to stop. But I honestly don't know if we can do it. To be honest, I'm pretty damned worried...and scared.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Rowan and I did this. We used to eat out at least once or twice a week, and now we do it more like two or three times a month. The savings very quickly add up!

Eating in saves LOTS of money! It's definitely the best way to go.

I don't allow myself to eat out more than once a month for the exact same reasons. The issue for me was that with my commute, it was really hard to plan that kind of meal.

We rarely go out to eat and I swear it’;s what has helped us stay afloat with the price of daycare. I eat lunch out a lot still, but only something under $5, and no more than twice weekly. somehow we’re doing it. We don’t even own a home. I doubt we’ll be able to buy here in Boston ever.
But yes, eating in has saved us a good amount.

I'm surprised that you can manage it down to $3 a person for a meal cooked at home (I know I can't do that with most major meals... though I can do it with lunches for Kiralee and Cindy). Different dietary needs and food sources and types will produce different results.

I can understand the cost of eating out... that's why we don't do it that often (about once a week for Kiralee and I, and once a week for Cindy and I if she's around on the weekend at all).

I would highly recommend getting a good electric coffee grinder, and home drip pot, and getting your wife weaned off of buying coffee out since that adds up very quickly. You should be able to buy beans fresh for about $9 a lb, which gets the cost of a cup of coffee way down from the takeout ones you've noted she drinks regularly.

Lunches are harder, especially when dealing with work, if your company sort of expects folks to gather to gather for lunch someplace outside the company (I don't know if you have that problem, some folks do).

$30 a meal for three is a lot... but then again we have a lot of buffet places around here and sandwich shops where you can do lunch for $6-$9 each....

My problem in money is the amount of organics and high quality foods I need to buy as per my doctor's dietary restrictions. I'm not supposed to do pasta or rice more than once each a week now, which cuts down on the inexpensive meal options something fierce... especially when I'm supposed to be eating non-redmeat proteins and can't digest a lot of salad foods...

You might want to go for trimming down to 1 meal out a week to start... eating out for many people is a stress reliever of sorts as well, especially if the chief cook only knows so many dishes to cook. Variety in diet for some folks is vital for their mental well being as well as biology.

Maybe, uhh, just cutting back by half as far as the eating out? It might be too much of a shock to the system to totally cut out dining out, perhaps. While the savings might not be as substantial, never eating out strikes me as way too much to try if you're all in a regular habit of it.

Mind you, I have pretty much no sense of how to budget and my food expenditures vary more with if I manage to get out and shop or what I buy on the spur of the moment as much as anything. Lately been eating less, for no clear reason.

i thought i was a big blower spending money to go get fast food twice a month and eat out once.. course i prob have like a 1/3 of your income too..

I learned how to cook this year and mostly stopped dining out. We still go out once or twice a month, but I usually bring my lunch to work, bring my own breakfast, make my own coffee, and have dinner at home with my man-thing. It saves TONS of money.

Also, it's really helped with weight loss.

It sounds like you're not used to being poor! I rarely ever eat out, but if I do AND I'm paying, it's at cheap places. 1-2 times a year I go out somewhere special, but usually on birthdays or anniversaries. And most of the time someone else helps foot the bill!

It's hard, and sometimes I miss it. I am absolutely fucking awful at cutting down on spending because I love shopping, especially online shops like etsy and ebay when you can spend $100 in one night. But it's worth it for a little bit of comfort and that little bit of a buffer you get. Being broke sucks. But at least you'll have money there for necessities and unexpected emergencies.

Rather than cutting her off completely, which may be a bit frightening for her and a month may seem really daunting...try halving the amount of times you eat out per month. It'll seem like a much smaller step down, it'll feel much more renewable and you won't feel the shock as much. You'll probably find you don't miss it as much as you thought you would. I find a home cooked meal prepared by a loved one much more enjoyable. Maybe instead of rushing to spend your small amount of spare money on restaurants, you could invest in a few new cookbooks, try out some new ingredients and get inventive in the kitchen? Hey, it might even make eating at home feel like a novelty again! I used to get so bored at home when I lived with my parents, because I felt like I was eating the same things over and over again. But now I can make things like tofu casserole, risotto, creole style kitchen, all manor of curries and tons of other dishes.

*hugs* All my support and thoughts, whatever decision you try to make. Just be warned, cutting a woman off from her spending (especially a bipolar one) can be a harrowing task! :-P

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