A hell of a dream

[bobquasit]

I had an incredibly bad dream this morning.

I woke up. And suddenly I remembered that we had had another child before Sebastian; a little boy, very much like him but without red hair. And for some reason, we'd given him away to an ignorant young couple that could only be described as white trash. They'd taken him away to live with them in Texas. The pain had been so great that for years we simply couldn't bear to think about it...and we'd ended up forgetting about our first son almost completely.

Until, for some reason, I suddenly remembered him.

We hadn't given him away as a baby; he'd been three or four years old, bright and talkative and loving. We'd promised to talk to him and see him again. But we didn't. And I could only wonder what our precious, intelligent little boy had come to in the care of those trashy strangers.

Throughout the dream, I was sobbing uncontrollably. The thought of our little guy in the hands of strangers, wondering what had happened to us or perhaps forgetting us, was more than I could bear.

Comments

[klyfix.livejournal.com]

Hmm, my amateur shrink finds the one aspect of the dream obvious; fear of losing your child. That's probably a universal thing though. Perhaps more interesting is the white trash from Texas. The implication is that Texas in your mind is pretty close to Hell (there's a western titled "From Hell to Texas" and when it came on the the TV where I was one viewer observed that there was no difference). Maybe the news with the Fundamentalist Mormons in Texas might have been an influence, but oddly enough (according to some news thing I saw) since Texas has no real Mormon history the state is actually in a better position to deal with the problem than authorities in Utah or Arizona.