Undeserving 1 & 2

I wish I were a nobleman;
I'd be a worthy knight.
I'd serve the cause of chivalry,
sword keen, and honor bright.

But instead I am a peasant.
I live down in the shit.
I think I'll take this pitchfork out,
and stab some noble git.

* * *

I am the soul of chivalry;
A knight both brave and true.
I'm courteous to every man,
and give my lord his due.

I champion the fairer sex.
I bow to every lass.
And that, my lord, is why I've got
this pitchfork in my ass.

---

(I hope nobody minds, but I wanted to put them together in the right order.)

Undeserving 1 & 2

I wish I were a nobleman;
I'd be a worthy knight.
I'd serve the cause of chivalry,
sword keen, and honor bright.

But instead I am a peasant.
I live down in the shit.
I think I'll take this pitchfork out,
and stab some noble git.

* * *

I am the soul of chivalry;
A knight both brave and true.
I'm courteous to every man,
and give my lord his due.

I champion the fairer sex.
I bow to every lass.
And that, my lord, is why I've got
this pitchfork in my ass.

---

(I hope nobody minds, but I wanted to put them together in the right order.)